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بعدا که تصمیم گرفتم این نوشته رو بزارم اینجا، گفتم با خودم که عکسم رو هم بزارم تا راحت تر بتونین قیافم رو تجسم کنین. تو عکس دارم ساکسیسفون گوش می کنم

sina

Kheily doos dashtam ke farsi type konam, ama nemishe khob! Balad nistam akhe! Dokme haye keyboardam ham az in neveshte ha nadare ke befahmam chi be chie. hasoodim mishe be in typista! Ke ye payan namaro ye rooze type mikonan! Hamahangie dasto maghzeshoon jalebe! Ama heirat avar nis!

Alan khodamo “skyview” mibinam! Injoori behtare chaghim maloom nis! Albate ye skyview zeshto bi ma’ni, bi hes, va be shedat khaste konande, ayeene otagham ham mese khodam shode, alaki khoshgel neshodan mide, shayadam man injori mibinam va oon hanuz sadeghe. Mamoolan vaghty adam ye chizi minvise ye mokhatabi dare, ya hade aghal ye kocholo fek mikone ke maslan chizi nanvise ke yeki bekhone badesh biad, khob vaghty adam mokhatabesh khodesh bashe bayad khodesho re’ayat kone! Chizi nanvise ke khodesh narahat she! Umm… dorogh bege bekhodesh, khodsho khar kone!

Va sina marde rooya ha! Kherse gharha! Dar yek otaghe 3X4 mione 7 ,8 milion adam, va te’dade ziadi apartemano, bozorgraho, mashino kheily chizaye dige, dar hale goosh kardan be saxifone, ye chiz hayee ro ba alefbaye English type mikone ke az nazare narf afzare WORD hamashoon dochare ghalate emlayee hastan va bayesti tashih beshan!
Az nazare adamaye atrafam, az nazare ketabayee ke mikhunam, va az nazare khodam, man meghdare ziadi ghalat az anvae mokhtalef hastam va bayad tashih besham.

Jalebe vaghty mikham baraye khodam chizi benvisam, ehsas mikonam asan khodamo nemishnasam, daem harfaye adamaye mokhtalef raje behem miad to zehnam! Ama mibinam ke hich kodom az in harfa male khodam nis. Hich kodom az fekram ham male khodam nis, ya az to ketabas, ya az to jomalate folan ostad sare folan class.
Man majmooe yee hastam az oon chizayee ke didam va shenidam. Yek albume selection ke esmam be onvane gerd avarande rooye jeldesh neveshte shode.

100 kilo vazn, 179.5 cm ghad, aaa be hame tahala dorogh goftam ke 180 cm am! Hata oon vaghty ke ba ghodrat va serahat migoftam ke az dorogh bizaram, yeki az 3 ta harfam doroghe mahz bood, va akhe ki bavaresh mishod ke sina mitune dorogh bege?! Khodamam bavaram nemishod, va chon bavaram nemishod, khob, bavar nemikardam.
Sina ye rastgo, sinaye pak, aaa PERFECT MAN!

Inke man adame khobiam ya adame badiam, aslan mohem nis, mohem iine ke … vaghean nemidunam mohem chie, tooye donyayee ke in rooza mibinam, fasele chiz haye por va kam ahamiat kheily kam shode. Ya behtar begam, hame chiz ye joorayee bi ahamiat shode, bish az had sade, bish az had mamooli, va man bish az had bi ehsas nesbat bemohit, hata in goli ke kenare panjereye trusemoone, az man be mohit bishtar vakonesh neshoon mide, hade aghal bargasho kajo rast mikone ta PHOTON haye bishtari ro be molkol haye kolorofile selol haye mojod dar barghash beresoone. Baroon miad, bad miad, barf miad, aftab mishe, abr mishe, rooz mishe, shab mishe, shanbe mishe, jome mishe, Ama otaghe man –doros mese zehnam- ba sokotesh be man mige ke dige hichi dar in jahan ke dar dastrese mane nemitune taghyeeri dar zarbahange tekrarie ghalbe man ijad kone. ro nemodaresh noghate R S Q bedune hich taghyeeri sal hast ke bala o payeen miran, va ghalbe man bedune hich angizeyee, hich falsafeyee, hich hadafi, mitape va mitape. Va hata ro in tapidan kontroli nadaram, shayad ye rooz az maghzam bekham ke dige fekr nakone va ghalbam dige natape, ama mosalaman oona be harfaye man tavajohi nakhand kard.

Hal, madas, vojod dare, va ayande khala’e, vojod nadare, va tebghe ghavanine fizik ke be esbat residan, made hamvare be samte khala’ keshide mishe! Inaro Boodriar talash karde to ketabe Amrika ash bege, man ehsase saboki mikonam, ehsase vojod nadashtan, ehsase khala’ bodan, ehsase ayande bodan, va chon man to ayandam, zendegy rooz mare baram kheily khaste konandas! Chon fek mikonam in rooz haye tekrari mese ye rahrooe ke bayad azash rad shi ta be otaghe badi beresi! Va otaghe badi va ba’di! Shayad age 4 5 sal pish emroozam ro mididam, migoftam! Ooh pesar to alan akhareshi dige! Dige mage zendgey behtar az iinam mishe? Tehran zendegy mikoni! Ovah ye computer Pentium 4! IPOD! (ehtemalan bayad be khodam tozih midadam ke ye joor walkmane tahavol yaftas!) mashinam ke zire pate, doos dokhtar! Daneshgah Tehran! Az sob ta shab ba adamaye migardi ke ye zamani ketabashoonam nemitunesti gir biari! Dige az in che behtar… alan daram fek mikonam sina e emrooz be sina e 4 5 sal dige chi mige!

Payan!

Perspolis_fall 2005

shahcheragh-shiraz- fall 2005

Ardeshir Palace- fall 2005

shahcheragh-shiraz-fall 2005

shiraz-fall 2005

Shiraz, fall 2005

I have felt the leisure of the sin
Under my teeth,

Dont wanna be holy again,
Please pleaseeeee

The hellish thoughts,
Invaded my mind,

The temptation,
Has made me blind,

Wakin up in gluttony,
Goin to bed in lust,

My greedy eyes,
Looking at the others
In disgust,

The fearful silence,
The clear absence,

The ugly betrayal,
And I sold my soul cheaply,
To those hands in the dark.

Sina - April 15 06

Grabbing my trough,
Holding my breath,
I feel it boiling inside,

Sina, April 06